Atrophy of social networks is a central feature of retirement. What kind of social network is left for those outside the economic arena?
SPOUSE if coherent, but the spouse is often boresighted on her health and yours, willing to take advantage of any apparent relative power shift toward her. Also will monopolize your time, thinking retirement means talking and reminiscing rather than the ultimately calm and resigned acceptance of one’s own death. For many the spouse is an anchor, but for many others that spouse is regarded as a dead weight.
OFFSPRING if not alienated. A surprisingly large segment of the population has alienated offspring whom the parents don’t communicate with regularly or don’t see frequently or don’t trust when they are all together.
NEW FRIENDS – this is an abysmal concept, almost unheard of in geriatric social situations. The reason is that elderly people are preposterously suspicious of each other.
FORMER CO-WORKERS tend to be whining about their medical problems or desiring to reminisce about how important they were in their old job. As a social network, they constitute a "sink hole" of wasted energy and effort.
FRIENDS MET THROUH JOINT HOBBIES seem to be among the best ways of meeting and getting to know new people. There’s a learning curve, one becomes an acquaintance of those who are at the same skill level as the self. For some reason, it seems to help if the other hobbyists also live independently in another building. Fellow dwellers of the same building tend to be bad friends when acquainted late in life.
THOSE BEING MENTORED BY THE ELDER himself are invaluable social contacts; it appears that respectful relationship across generational lines provide nearly the only valuable people a retiree wants to hear from or get to know more about.
SIBLINGS – don’t know much about these. Can they be trusted?
REUNIONS are a nightmare of misplaced and misremembered nostalgia. "Don’t bother unless you’re strong enough to survive the damage and the dings."
PETS can help a retired person maintain sanity and keep profound loneliness at bay.
THE INTERNET seems to suck lemons socially. Now, to be fair, I’ve known some people who met and married after getting to know each other over the internet. But there is something profoundly creepy and surreal about each of those couples. The internet seems to carry a very high quotient of cooties, very near 100%.
SUMMATION: "Overall, socially, retirement is a demolition derby."
--unknown but brilliant author
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Comment by the Blog Author
This is a brilliantly honest analysis, virtually an example of "shock humor" for its candor.
SIBLINGS – I don’t know much about these, either. But! If you have more money than they do, watch it! They will suck up to you and fight each other like demons over your will after you die – and the more money you have the harder they will fight. Even your children may go after each other tooth and nail. "Good" news: if you leave your money to a charity, the siblings will likely all lose their fights against the will.
SPOUSE if coherent, but the spouse is often boresighted on her health and yours, willing to take advantage of any apparent relative power shift toward her. Also will monopolize your time, thinking retirement means talking and reminiscing rather than the ultimately calm and resigned acceptance of one’s own death. For many the spouse is an anchor, but for many others that spouse is regarded as a dead weight.
OFFSPRING if not alienated. A surprisingly large segment of the population has alienated offspring whom the parents don’t communicate with regularly or don’t see frequently or don’t trust when they are all together.
NEW FRIENDS – this is an abysmal concept, almost unheard of in geriatric social situations. The reason is that elderly people are preposterously suspicious of each other.
FORMER CO-WORKERS tend to be whining about their medical problems or desiring to reminisce about how important they were in their old job. As a social network, they constitute a "sink hole" of wasted energy and effort.
FRIENDS MET THROUH JOINT HOBBIES seem to be among the best ways of meeting and getting to know new people. There’s a learning curve, one becomes an acquaintance of those who are at the same skill level as the self. For some reason, it seems to help if the other hobbyists also live independently in another building. Fellow dwellers of the same building tend to be bad friends when acquainted late in life.
THOSE BEING MENTORED BY THE ELDER himself are invaluable social contacts; it appears that respectful relationship across generational lines provide nearly the only valuable people a retiree wants to hear from or get to know more about.
SIBLINGS – don’t know much about these. Can they be trusted?
REUNIONS are a nightmare of misplaced and misremembered nostalgia. "Don’t bother unless you’re strong enough to survive the damage and the dings."
PETS can help a retired person maintain sanity and keep profound loneliness at bay.
THE INTERNET seems to suck lemons socially. Now, to be fair, I’ve known some people who met and married after getting to know each other over the internet. But there is something profoundly creepy and surreal about each of those couples. The internet seems to carry a very high quotient of cooties, very near 100%.
SUMMATION: "Overall, socially, retirement is a demolition derby."
--unknown but brilliant author
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Comment by the Blog Author
This is a brilliantly honest analysis, virtually an example of "shock humor" for its candor.
SIBLINGS – I don’t know much about these, either. But! If you have more money than they do, watch it! They will suck up to you and fight each other like demons over your will after you die – and the more money you have the harder they will fight. Even your children may go after each other tooth and nail. "Good" news: if you leave your money to a charity, the siblings will likely all lose their fights against the will.
No comments:
Post a Comment